Happy Birthday, Mila!

Recycled Birthday Greetings

May 28, 2011
"We don't stop laughing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop laughing."

Health & Happiness to you always.
Happy Birthday, Mila!
From Your ALT Friends.

Published  5/27/11  altgroup  multiply
Web Page:  Happy Birthday, Mila!

Anger Management

I keep giggling all the way down! Whoo!  Someone just wrote me on YouTube the other day to get off my fat ass and work! 
 

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From:
Subject: Anger Management
Date: Thu, 19 May 2011 14:19:58 -0500

This is a little long but read it all. It is so good!  Anger Management    When you occasionally have a really bad day, And you just need to take it out on someone, Don't take it out on someone you know, Take it out on someone you don't know, But you know deserves it. I was sitting at my desk when I remembered A phone call I'd forgotten to make.     I found the number and dialed it.    A man answered, saying 'Hello..'     I politely said, 'This is Rick Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?'     Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear 'Get the right f***ing number!' And the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.    When I tracked down Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.     After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.     When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled 'You're an asshole!' And hung up.     I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, 'You're an ass hole!'    It always cheered me up.     When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic 'ass hole' calling would have to stop.     So, I called his number and said, 'Hi, this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?'    He yelled, 'NO!', and slammed down the phone.     I quickly called him back and said, 'That's because you're an ass hole!' And hung up.    One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.    Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for.     I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me.     I noticed a 'For Sale' sign in his back window, so I wrote down his number.     A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had his number on speed dial) I thought that I'd better call the BMW asshole, too.    I said, 'Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?' He said, 'Yes, it is.'     I then asked, 'Can you tell me where I can see it?'    He said, 'Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd. , in Fairfax .   It's a yellow ranch style house and the car's parked right out in front.'     I asked, 'What's your name?'    He said, 'My name is Don Hansen.'    I asked, 'When's a good time to catch you, Don?'     He said, 'I'm home every evening after five.'    I said, 'Listen, Don, can I tell you something?'    He said, 'Yes?'     I said, 'Don, you're an asshole!'     Then I hung up, And added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a real problem, I had two assholes to call.    Then I came up with an idea...     I called asshole #1.     He said, 'Hello'    I said, 'You're an ass hole!' (But I didn't hang up.)    He asked, 'Are you still there?' I said, 'Yeah!'     He screamed, 'Stop calling me'     I said, 'Make me.' He asked, 'Who are you?'    I said, 'My name is Don Hansen.'   He said, 'Yeah? Where do you live?' I said, 'Asshole, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd. , in Fairfax . It's a yellow ranch style home and I have a black Beamer parked in front.' He said, 'I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers.' I said, 'Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole,' And hung up.    Then I called Asshole #2.     He said, 'Hello?'     I said, 'Hello, asshole,'     He yelled, 'If I ever find out who you are...'     I said, 'You'll what?'     He exclaimed, 'I'll kick your ass'     I answered, 'Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now.'    Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I was on my way over to 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax ,to kill my gay lover. Then I called Channel 7 News about the gang war going down on Oaktree Blvd in Fairfax .    I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax .    I got there just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew. NOW I feel much better.    Anger management really does work.

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The Shortest Distance PowerPoint

Hello My Traveling Friends:


Whoa! This is really scary for me like the very first time as a new driver driving to Smoky Mountain, Tennessee, the LA Freeway and to Taxco, Mexico (I was not the one driving).  I don't recall taking the spiral highway in Shanghai when I was there in 2007.  This is my problem when I travel from city to city - - the moment I get back home I seem to forget the places I've been.  It's mindblowing.  Before clicking the attached ppt, turn on your speaker and enjoy the song The Long and Winding Road - - the last group song of The Beatles.  Thanks for sharing, Tina.

Okedoke.  Get your motor running, buckle up and go!
Summer is coming.  

Attachment: Routestv.ppt

Ex-Governator's Love Child

There's truth in the expression men will be men.  Polygamous by nature.  However, this applies to women also.  It's the caveman's syndrome.  It's truly remarkable that once in a while the gossipy National Inquirer fails in digging the hidden dirt secrets of celebrities and other famous people.  Okedoke...this kind of stuff goes on all the time and everyday to ordinary folks -- the sexual attraction at close encounter is strong and the human flesh is weak!  So...so what? I was told by a man friend that the Terminator (aka Gropenator) took care of Maria and his family and the needs of both his household staff 'lovey-dovey' and young child,  They should thank Arnold in not saying, HASTA LA VISTA, BABY!





Published  5/17/11  altgroup multiply
Web Page:  Ex-Governator's Love Child

The Latest Technology PowerPoint

This is so cool.  Perfect invention.  Being a waterbaby, I'd like to have the fish aquarium.  Which is yours?

Attachment: thelatesttechnology.pps

Water Closet Around the World

VERY ARTISTIC AND TOTALLY  IMAGINATIVE! TITILLATING!
CLICK POWERPOINT ATTACHMENT wc bemutato mi AND ENJOY THE MUSIC.

Attachment: WC_bemutato_mi.pps

High-speed trains

Click this: High-speed trains

IS CHICAGO IN NEED OF HIGH-SPEED TRAINS TO ST. LOUIS AND DETROIT?

A COCKAMAMIE IDEA ! A BOONDOGGLE IDEA!

See awesome powerpoint attachment and see how money is well-spent: Big, big difference ($2 billion vs $4 billion)!

Famous People Painting with Wiki Links | Historical Figures With Image Map - ClipTank.com

http://cliptank.com/PeopleofInfluencePainting.htm
Famous & Notorious

Israel Forever

ISRAEL
Chosen Land.   Chosen People.
I think, by far and so far, the best power point presentation of Israel. 

Attachment: ISRAEL.ppt  [LINK BROKEN]


Published 5/3/11  altgroup multiply
Web Page: Israel Forever

9/11 Power Point

Click > 9/11 Power Point

Post Notes:

I was watching my favorite TV show "CSI: Miami" when I was interrupted right when it's almost ending. For a few minutes, I keep guessing what's the big news alert. Not a moment longer I heard "Osama is dead." Finally, after almost ten years since that surprise attack of September 11, the most hunted and wanted man in the modern history of mankind was caught dead, not alive, by the elite team, the best of the best, of the American military. Thank you so much, new American heroes!

Let me tell you something that happened a few weeks ago, I usually tune in to "This Week" with Christiane Amanpour after watching "FOX News Sunday" with Cris Wallace. In that particular program, Amanpour had an all woman panel - one guest panelist from Egypt, one funny-looking woman with the most unusual super big, flat ears, and the other two women from some kind of organizations. The Egyptian guest during the interview said, "Bush (George W,) is the evil twin of Osama (bin Laden). Where is Amanpour getting all these women? How disgusting is that?

This is just the beginning of the end of the war on terror. Is Osama having a good time with his 72 virgins? Or, is he in hell reading Satanic Verses?

Nevertheless, the next in the list to catch is Zawahiri.