FOR THE HELL'S ANGELS AND DEVILS IN
DISGUISE....
DISGUISE....
The following is an actual exam question given on a
University of
Washington chemistry mid-term. The
answer by one student was so "profound"
that the
professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet,
which is,
of course, why we have the pleasure of
enjoying it as well.
Bonus
Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat)
or Endothermic (absorbs
heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their belief
using Boyle's
Law (Gas cools off when it expands and
heats up when it is compressed.) or
some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
"First,
we need to know how the mass of Hell is
changing in time. So we need to know
the rate at
which souls are moving into Hell and the rate that
they are
leaving."
"I think that we can safely assume that once a soul
gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore no souls
are leaving."
"As for how
many souls are entering Hell, lets look
at the different religions that exist
in the world
today. Some of these religions state that if you are
not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there are more than one
of these religions and
since people do not belong to more than one
religion,
we can project that most souls go to Hell."
"With birth and
death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to
increase
exponentially." "Now, we look at the rate of change
of the volume
in Hell because Boyle's Law states that
in order for the temperature and
pressure in Hell to
stay the same, then Hell must expand
proportionately
as souls are added." This gives two possibilities:
1.
If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate
at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and
pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks
loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than
the
rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature
and pressure will
drop until Hell freezes over.
If we accept the postulate given to me by
Teresa
during my Freshman year, that "it will be a cold day
in Hell before
I sleep with you," and take into
account the fact that I still have not
succeeded in
having that event take place, then #2 cannot be
true, and
thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic
and will not freeze."
This
student received the only 'A' in the class!
University of
Washington chemistry mid-term. The
answer by one student was so "profound"
that the
professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet,
which is,
of course, why we have the pleasure of
enjoying it as well.
Bonus
Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat)
or Endothermic (absorbs
heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their belief
using Boyle's
Law (Gas cools off when it expands and
heats up when it is compressed.) or
some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
"First,
we need to know how the mass of Hell is
changing in time. So we need to know
the rate at
which souls are moving into Hell and the rate that
they are
leaving."
"I think that we can safely assume that once a soul
gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore no souls
are leaving."
"As for how
many souls are entering Hell, lets look
at the different religions that exist
in the world
today. Some of these religions state that if you are
not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there are more than one
of these religions and
since people do not belong to more than one
religion,
we can project that most souls go to Hell."
"With birth and
death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to
increase
exponentially." "Now, we look at the rate of change
of the volume
in Hell because Boyle's Law states that
in order for the temperature and
pressure in Hell to
stay the same, then Hell must expand
proportionately
as souls are added." This gives two possibilities:
1.
If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate
at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and
pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks
loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than
the
rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature
and pressure will
drop until Hell freezes over.
If we accept the postulate given to me by
Teresa
during my Freshman year, that "it will be a cold day
in Hell before
I sleep with you," and take into
account the fact that I still have not
succeeded in
having that event take place, then #2 cannot be
true, and
thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic
and will not freeze."
This
student received the only 'A' in the class!
Living
Very profound, indeed, hellboy!
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