3 Minute Management Course

 Management 101

 Lesson One: An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A  small
 rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and  do
 nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on  the
 ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared,
jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

 Management Lesson:
 To be sitting  and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

 Lesson Two: A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to
 get to the  top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the
 energy." "Well,  why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied
the bull. " They're  packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of
 dung, and found it  actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest
 branch of the tree. The  next day, after eating some more dung, he reached
 the second branch. Finally  after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly
 perched at the top of the
tree.  He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who
 shot him out of the  tree.

 Management Lesson:
 Bull shit might get you to the top, but it  won't keep you there.

 Lesson Three:
 A little bird was flying south  for the winter. It was so
 cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a  large field. While he
 was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on  him. As the frozen
 bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to  realize how warm he was.
 The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there  all warm and happy, and
 soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the  bird singing and came
 to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered  the bird under the
 pile of cow dung, and
promptly dug him out and ate  him.

 Management Lesson: (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your  enemy.
 (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend..
 (3)  And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

 This  ends the three minute management course...

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Originally Published on May 24, 2006
MSN Groups Website
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